This past week I've been playing phone tag with Chris the guitarist/ singer from Less Than
Jake, Gainesville's own ska punk heroes, trying to set up an interview for this rag. After
about ten tries we finally set up a time and a place this past Tuesday. Tuesday isn't usually
one of my favorite days- better than Monday, but it sure as hell ain't no Thursday. This
Tuesday turned out to be the shit. Early in the day I found a killer Mustard Plug tshirt at
Hyde N' Zeke's, a good friend of mine came into town, and finally I was invited to go to
LTJs warehouse to watch them practice before the interview! Fuckin A! I'm about the
happiest little shit at Camp Skapunk right now. I had to have my buddy slap me to get the
grin off my face when I told him how I'd be spending my evening. Anyways, I get to the
warehouse and the band ( minus Jessica and Buddy ) is getting ready to play, so they ask me
what I wanted to hear! ME! Little inconsequential Fly gets to make a request to my favorite
band. "Son of Dick, please", I say. And BAM! They play it. In the next twenty minutes they
go on to play two tracks off the upcoming Greece soundtrack cover album (CD ?) and about
4 or 5 unreleased songs. It was Fuckin unbelievable. So finally we get down to business as
Less Than Jake bare their souls to me. Among other things, I discovered that several band
members secretly wish to break up and reform as an 80's metal band, Derron is apt to not
say much, smokin out before an interview makes a band sound better than they really are
(just joking), and Less Than Jake is a buncha down to earth losers just like you and me. So
here we go, my little chat with Chris the guitarist/ vocals, Vinny the drummer/ pizza expert,
Derron the Baritone Sax player/ Team Citation race car driver, and Roger the bassist/ vocals.
Together they form

LESS THAN JAKE

Me: Okay, who the hell is Howie Reynolds?

C: Ooh, good start. Howie is our 73 year old neighbor in our apartment complex. He
rocks. Got the heart of a fuckin l 0 year old, he comes to our shows and crowd surfs.
He's gonna get on stage at the Dish and do something nutty. 
R: Do a monologue or something. He's a trippy old dude. 
C: You'll hear him talking on our new CD. 

Me: Besides your music, what's important to you guys?

R: That the van has oil! And we have shows booked somewhere.
V: And that the fuckin thing works.
C: Um girls.
R: We're pretty basic. Pez dispensers are high on the list.
V: TV is pretty crucial.

Me: In order of importance, how would you rate drugs, pizza, and 
Pez?

( long delay while the band members ponder this most cosmic of questions)
R: Pizza and Pez are pretty high on my list. V: Dude, I eat pizza everyday. I'm
serious. But I'd say Pez, pizza, drugs. D: Yeah, Pez, pizza, drugs. C: I think it's
unanimous.

( the conversation steers to Pizza for a while as I try to discover which states have the
best and worse. It looks like New York is where the good shit is at. Frozen wise,
our uncontested vote goes to Totino's. 4 pizzas for 5 bucks. Can't be beat.)
Me: Which would you give up first, smoking or drinking?
C: Drinking.
R: Drinking.
V: Drinking anyday. I'll never give up cigarettes.
Me: Okay, how about Star Wars vs. Star Trek?
D&C: Star Wars!
R: Probably 70/ 30 Star Wars, but Star Trek kicks ass in a totally different way.
V: Cartoon Network. And 80's TV over any of that.
R: Dukes of Hazard!
C: Boss Hog rocks.
Me: So what have you guys been doing lately?
R: Doin nothing.
C: Well, we recorded for a month and a half, some other shit like answering mail.
Me: Any tour stories?
R: Where do we begin?
V: Dude, weird shit happens everyday on tour. The best was Kansas City.
C: Yeah, some guy in the back of the club, just some guy off the street, I told him to
get on stage and he totally got up and danced for a whole song and just rocked out.
V: He got all emotional on us!